The Message You Need to SELL, Vs the Message Within

Quote - Its Okay to MarketOne of the things I’m most commonly asked is how to really package up your message so that people want to buy what you’re selling.

It seems that a lot of women entrepreneurs who KNOW they are called for big things veer wildly back and forth between selling what they think will sell (the implication here being – based on reality! – that it’s not stuff they REALLY want to deliver) or between trying to do the ‘real’ work they were called to do.

The latter is exciting and empowering – until nobody bites and you find yourself with MASSIVE frustration throwing in the towel once more about doing all that ‘deep stuff’ and going back to what you know works, or let’s say THINK you know works.

Can I tell you what the problem is here?

Actually there are two problems, and I have extreme amounts of personal experience dealing with both of them!

1) You’re not being totally honest with your clients – and probably therefore not with yourself either – about what ‘it’ really takes

2) You’re trying to choose a single message when you actually have two

Okay, so what’s that now, TWO messages?! I thought we were supposed to have our ‘one true message’ that is our real THING and that’s what it’s all about?!


That’s true.

But there are LAYERS to that message and the layers have to do with where your FOLLOWERS are on their journey.

Take Jesus, for example.

Jesus had followers who were basically the ‘general community’ who came to him because they wanted their immediate problems and pains fixed. Heal me, fix me, help me!

They just wanted to get out of pain and maybe feel better about themselves.

Then he had his true DISCIPLES – his inner circle. Do you think that the message he shared with his disciples was the same as the one he shared to the crowds, or to the 5000? To a DEGREE, yes. But he also paid attention to their right NOW hurts and needs and pains. And spoke to them about how to fix those more ‘surface based’ woes. He certainly did so by ‘tying in’ his deeper message of transformation and truth, but he wasn’t speaking to the masses in the same way he spoke to his disciples, or even to those who perhaps considered themselves true disciples or followers but who weren’t in the ‘inner circle’.

When you speak to your community, you have to be able to differentiate between your true ALREADY converted disciples, and those who are perhaps intrigued by what you have to say but primarily because they think maybe you can help them right now with their pains and problems.

Your inner circle, your current loyal clients and followers and those who totally GET you, well they GET you, right? And they for the most part get IT, as well, even though I’m sure you from time to time have to guide and direct them back onto the path of what truly matters.

But the newbies, those who are for whatever reason called to listen to you – they are not yet that evolved! And if they were then maybe they wouldn’t be knocking on your door for help, so this is an OKAY thing.

It’s up to you to honour where your clients are at in THEIR journey. You got to go through your own journey of transformation and evolution, so let them go through theirs! The reality is that people don’t really WANT the deeper message (even though deep down yes they do want it!) when they have pressing pains and problems that they perceive as needing fixing FIRST.

So you have one message for those who are already converted, and you have basically a more well MARKETED message for those who are listening but not yet sure.

What do I mean by more well marketed?

I simply mean that you share your message of truth and what it really takes but you actively and directly link this back to how it can help that person NOW.

Jesus said “follow me, because I am the way, the truth and the light”, and some people followed for THAT reason. But many people followed him or came to him because he performed miracles and basically helped them sort out their shit in the here and now! And then over TIME they became converts.

Now you and I, we certainly have nothing like the transformative or compelling power that Jesus has, so why on earth would we think we can tout the online equivalent of ‘follow me, because I have the answers and can save you’, without first actually HELPING people with the stuff that’s bothering them?!

Pretty arrogant, right?

And foolish.

So yes, you have to have two messages.

But what about the honesty part? Well, this is where so many of us get it wrong. We ‘get’ the need to market based on what people want, and to make grandiose offers about how we can save or fix people, but we fall into a TRAP of doing it based on stuff we don’t believe in.

What this comes down to is: your marketing must match your deeper message.

Another way of saying it is that your surface ‘for the masses’ message has to DIRECTLY connect to your deeper message.

For example, when Jesus was helping people sort out their various strifes or ails he often told a parable (a story) that showed some deeper message or ‘what this is really about’ type lesson. So even as he was fixing the ‘then and there’ problem he was EDUCATING people about what really mattered.

In business it’s easy to fall into a trap of telling people that yes! You can deliver what THEY think you should deliver even when deep down you don’t really believe that’s what they need. Or it could be that the way you are delivering your service is based on what people seem to want, but the truth is you know that doing it that way is not going to ultimately get them to where they want to go.

So this is where you need to be HONEST about what you believe it really takes, and tell people. It’s where, if you are ‘helping someone put a bandaid on something’, so to speak, that you at the same time talk to them about the fact that it’s just a freaking bandaid. And that the hurt beneath it is going to take something greater to fix.

And you tell them what that something is and they LISTEN because you gave them the bandaid they wanted.

But they won’t listen if you don’t give them the bandaid, you know?

But this doesn’t mean you JUST give them the bandaid and try to SEPARATE that from your true message!

Of course in sharing your true honest message you often risk pissing people off, or having them actively disagree with you, or perhaps just flat out turn AWAY from you.

Well guess what?

That’s going to happen in business no matter which way you try to play it!

So you may as well polarise for something you BELIEVE in, right?

I know I’m kind of pushing the Jesus example a lot here, but it’s so relevant.

Jesus always knew that some people would not listen and that some people would even hate him for speaking the truth but yet he STOOD UP FOR WHAT HE BELIEVED IN and knew was true. He fought his fight. He was compassionate and genuine in his desire to help people with their woes and hurts, but he minced no words in telling them what REALLY mattered.

And those who ultimately chose to follow him were THANKFUL for that.

Do you think he could have ever caused any sort of a revolution or following had he hidden his message of truth, or tried to keep it just as an occasional thing, or just for his disciples?

Of course not!

So here’s how we bring this into action for you, for me, for today:

– If you want to cause a following and start a revolution you have to speak your truth every DAY

– You must NEVER back down from what you believe – be honest about what you stand for, no matter what others think!

– You have to meet people where they ARE though, you can’t expect them to listen to your deep shit when they come to you asking for a bandaid. Give ’em the freaking bandaid, and then maybe they’ll shut up and listen.

– Some WILL listen, and follow you all the way. Some will NOT, they will take their bandaid and be on their way, or they’ll tell you it’s the wrong colour and storm off in a huff. SO WHAT. Your job is to just keep showing up every day. Helping people with what they came to you for. And then sharing your message of truth.

If right now you feel as though you’re not really doing what you want to be doing and that people don’t GET it, I guarantee you’re either only dealing with surface shit (and probably in a way you don’t really want to) OR else you’re trying to make everybody be instantly evolved to ‘inner circle’ status.

Start meeting people where they’re at.

And then tell them the truth.

You’ve got this sister.

Remember –

Life is Now. Press Play.

Kat x

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PS – I’m looking for 5 MEGA committed kickass women to begin a 5-week private Success Mindset Apprenticeship with me, starting Monday week. If you’re ready to step up and create ABSOLUTE TRANSFORMATION in who you ARE, and therefore what you HAVE, message me for more info x

You Have a Destiny … NOW is the Time to Fulfil It!

Quote - You are here for a reasonDo you ever find yourself wondering what the point of it all is?

I know I do from time to time. I realise that might come as a surprise. I’m aware I very much give off an attitude of knowing exactly what I want and why, and then doing my very best to work towards it each day from a place of total alignment. It’s also what my message is, right? Get clear about what you really want and are called to do and then do the work to make it HAPPEN.

So it stands to reason that I’d be doing the same in my own life.

And I am; I do … for the most part.

But sometimes when I sit on the beach at the end of my work time, or when I’m walking to a cafe where I’m about to begin writing, or when I first wake up in the morning and think (probably too much!) about what I feel motivated to do that day I definitely QUESTION.

And I find myself asking things like what’s the point anyway, what is it for, does it even all MEAN anything and who even cares?!

I look at my work, the stuff I obviously DO care about so much seeing as how I can’t stop writing, speaking, thinking about it, and I wonder if it actually even makes any sense, and whether there’s a TRUE need to think so much about what we really want for our lives, what we’re called for and how to create it or if we all should just take a deep breath and focus on the basic or normal things we need to stay afloat in our lives, get by quite nicely, and ultimately be able to look back on a life filled with normal nice things.

Like owning a nice house, a few nice cars, sending your kids to good schools, having a family, taking some nice trips, having a cool social circle, maybe going to the odd personal development workshop here and there. Reading good books. Going to movies. Living. Being. Waiting.

Waiting, I guess what I’m saying is, for when it’s all over.

And then – well, what was the point?

You made a life. Had a house. Popped out some kids. Took care of them.

That’s good. And it is good, I’m not being tongue-in-cheek. Certainly the raising happy healthy strong kids part of it is a BIG motivation for me. Maintaining good relationships, fun and happy relationships, with my family and my best friends – that’s big for me as well. That is stuff I absolutely consider an ESSENTIAL value-based use of my time and energy, it’s ‘this is what it’s all about’ type stuff.

But the thing is that if I just stop with all that stuff – the normal stuff – then I guess it would mean that the point of MY life is to raise the next generation as well as be a good, supportive, loving etc wife, daughter, sister, friend. And to maybe have some cool experiences along the way, enjoy life a little, achieve the usual markers of safety and success, and teach my kids how to do the same in their own time.

And as much as I’m truly happy for (although befuddled by) anyone who is content with this, it’s just not enough for me.

I just can’t believe that my purpose here on earth is to purely be a mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend and then teach my kids how they too can live into a similar normal role in their own lives. To me it feels like that would mean the whole point of even BEING here is just to pave the way for the ones after us.

Which I guess actually IS what I think, but in a different way. I guess I think that truly paving the way for those who come after us means trying to in some way leave the world a better place.

Now you can leave the world a better place by impacting one person, or a handful of people, or millions of people.

Neither is better than the other; I don’t think.

You can’t say that if somebody is ‘just’ a mother their life has less meaning than if they impact millions. What if that person’s calling was to be a mother, to raise a child? What if that CHILD impacts millions? Or what if they don’t; it doesn’t matter, the POINT is that it matters that we each do what we are called to do.

And deep within, where we often don’t dare to look because it is at times painful to confront the reality of, we each know what we are called to do.

I know I am called to use my words – mainly through writing, but also through some speaking – to impact millions of people around the world. To inspire, motivate, empower and ASS-KICK them to get into alignment and clarity around what they truly desire, what they are CALLED for, and then to push them off that ledge into action to make it happen.

My DESTINY, quite simply, is to help others be honest about, and then live, their destiny.

To inspire them to press play!

And that’s the whole point –

I can be as busy as I like creating content and promotions and building an online business but unless I am actively THROUGH MY WORDS inspiring others to press play, then there really IS no point for me, nor in terms of how my work might be able to impact you.

I don’t really care about so many things to do with online business, or business, or success. I don’t care how you go about doing your launches or promos or whatever. I don’t care what your program name is. I don’t care what’s on your website or which social media platforms you’re using. I don’t even care that you want to make money, to be perfectly honest with you, nor do I care about myself making money!

Unless. And it’s a BIG unless, but the only way I care about any of that stuff or can even bring myself to think about it is if you are first and foremost being honest with yourself about what you really want, what you are here for, and if you’re then DOING IT. Obviously the same goes for me also being honest with myself and then doing it!

And I think that when your focus point is being in alignment with your true calling; your destiny, that you will create and produce what you are MEANT to, and you will have the impact – whether on one person or one hundred or one hundred million – that you are meant to have, and it won’t matter HOW you went about doing it, you will FIND the how by first tuning in to the WHO YOU ARE.

It’s all that matters.

When all is said and done, who are you deep within and who do you choose to be BASED on that deeper reality?

When I find myself wondering what the point of it all is, it’s because I know that I’ve in some way stepped out of alignment. Sometimes it’s that I’m getting too caught up in ‘busywork’ in my business, too distracted by things I should or could do or finding myself responding to what others want from me (or what I think they want!) rather than giving what I am meant to give.

Sometimes it’s because I am allowing business itself to be a distraction from things that matter even MORE to me, like my own health and wellbeing, like being the kind of mother I want to be to my kids.

And sometimes it’s just because I’m thinking about it too much.

But usually, when we find ourselves wondering “what’s the point anyway?”, it’s because the stuff that we are doing and who we are being is not ON point.

We’re not doing what we really care about.

We’re not being who we believe we’re born to be.

We’re not VALUING what we value, and going all in at SHOWING we value it.

To me there is nothing more exciting than the idea that I am here for a reason, that I have true gifts and talents to share with the world; a destiny to live into. It’s incredible empowering to think about, not just because I do want to impact others but also because there is no greater joy than doing the work you were born to do. If you’ve not yet fully experienced that, or allowed yourself to, let me tell you this is a freedom that can’t be purchased or exchanged for money, time, knowledge, gifts, anything. You have to unleash it from within, and it costs you nothing to do.

But yet so few do.

If knowing I have a destiny and a purpose is the most exciting thing I can think of, then on the flip-side of that is the impossible to ignore reality that there is nothing more TERRIFYING than the idea of knowing I have a purpose and a destiny and yet NOT living into it.

I don’t know if you agree with me or not, perhaps you can think of worse things in life than not living the life you were called for.

But if you’re not sure, then think about it this way –

What do you think you would MOST regret, if you your life were to end this year? What would you most be devastated about not having done, created, produced or BEEN?

Now flip that stuff around and imagine you did it, created it, produced it, became it.

That’s your destiny gorgeous.

Go claim it.

Remember –

Life is Now. Press Play.


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PS My new online adventure, The Fuck the Shoulds UPRISING, is open for registrations! But hurry because the ‘get in quick’ rate is on right now! It’s 15 Days to Epic Fun, Fearlessness, and a HELL YEAH Business and Life You Never Wanna Quit!

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10 Ways to Be Fearless and Just. Fucking. Trust!

Quote - Either way some people wont like you

I realised yesterday that I’ve really NOT being the fearless badass chick I would like to think of myself as being. Matter of fact … if I’m being totally honest with you, and I really do try to be (but sometimes I just don’t even know my own mind, y’know?!) … I’m pretty fucking wussy a lot of the time.

I worry constantly about what people will think –

If I’m doing enough –

Giving enough –

Am enough – !

I know I present this out there full on over the top confident image online and I know I DO actually do a lot of stuff that I guess is on the surface pretty fearless, pretty evident of me actively CHOOSING my reality.

And I do. I do choose my reality.

But a lot of the time I choose to put uncertainty ahead of trusting in ME and what I know is right for me and ultimately also how I know I can most help you and unleash MY awesome into the world!

How much of the time, when I say a lot?

Enough that I notice, and that’s too much for me.

Doesn’t matter whether it’s once a day or once a week if you KNOW you are in any way NOT fully shining your light or if you’re being guided by ‘what if’ or by trying to ‘do the right thing’ then you’re NOT really playing all out, are you?

And since my whole freaking message is press play, that’d make ME for one a crazy crazy silly little scared bitch. In a nice way.

Soooo … I’ve been thinking about fearlessness.

I was talking yesterday with my incredible kinesiologist and we had the realisation that the last time I was FULLY fearless in what I was doing, and fully TRUSTED in the value of what I do and just let loose and WAS loose (not like that okay!!) and just showed up every day having a great time, being me, working my ass off because of the LOVE of it and never WORRYING about what anybody thought of me because I BELIEVED in me was when I was managing a pool hall /nightclub back in the good ole town of Knox (those in the know … YOU know!) when I was 18 / 19 years old.

Honestly I look back on that time of basically being irresponsible – I walked away from Uni and my at the time lifelong dream (one of ’em) of being a lawyer, and worked at a pool hall for fucks sake! I wore a blonde Barbie style wig and called myself Melanie! Because I somehow got more tips with the wig and persona. lol. My hair was dark brown then … I was also very shy naturally, very introverted, no way at ALL the cool chick who I like to think I am now! I had a lot to prove. But when I was in that bar … I was on fire. I KNEW I was fucking awesome at what I was doing, I knew I was the fastest, the best, I CARED THE MOST.

Which was maybe a good or a bad thing, who knows, but whatever it was it was FUN. I felt free. I felt in the zone. I LIKED working my ass off and then I liked hanging out partying drinking whatever, nothing ott just having a good time with the other bar peeps. I felt like I belonged, was accepted, was valued because I was valuing MYSELF first and foremost and I BELIEVED in myself. I used to often suggest extra things I could do – like creating special holiday promotions – to the owners and then bill them for the extra hours I put in. I totally just told them, owned it, expected it to work … and it did.

I often think of that time in my life as one of the best times of my life and I’ve always thought it was because it was just being young and cool and whatever and exploring life a bit but I realise now it was because I was being ME and owning my awesome. Not questioning whether I was good enough. Not questioning whether people would like me. Not questioning whether others would value my work. I knew I was rocking it!

And yesterday I started thinking – when was the last time I FULLY owned my awesome?

(Same question for you by the way m’dear!)

The truth is that as much as I DO know I am pretty good at putting the ‘real me’ out there and I do act PRETTY well from alignment there is still an element of THINKING about it too much which I feel is holding me back.

The problem with this of course, is that how do you ‘fix’ or improve something if the inherent issue is in fact too much thinking about how to fix or improve it!

You see my dilemna.

The more you think about how to be in alignment the more you are likely to do a VERSION or some sort of a MIRROR of you just BEING in alignment.

It’s like that whole saying that goes around … you don’t be authentic by trying to be authentic! You be authentic by just BEING. You be you by just BEING, not by asking yourself how you can be more you!

Am I the only one confused here???!

I think I’m kinda getting it though …

If I think back to that time of freedom and fun back in the pool hall days I NEVER thought about how I could do a good job or whether I was doing it right; I just DID. I just went with the flow! I wanted to wear a blonde wig, so I did! I wanted to dress in a catsuit one day, so I did! I wanted to fly around the bar at a million miles an hour doing 10 drinks in the time everyone else did 1 (and also breaking 10x as many glasses I must admit) and so I DID, because I just FELT like it.

When was the last time you just did what you FELT like doing for an entire day in your biz?

How about a week?

A month?!

Not freaking likely, right? Too many RESPONSIBILITIES, too many things to worry about, too many questions to ask!

Asking questions is good. It helps us to become aware of what is working and what we want more of, and of what our greatest desires and dreams are. But it’s critical to ask the RIGHT questions, and here is where I think the ‘trick’ to all of this lies:

Don’t ask questions about what you should DO in order to achieve an outcome, ask questions about how you need to FEEL to achieve that outcome.

Like if I ask myself what I should DO to be fearless, I straight away take the ability to be fearless away from myself anyway because I’m trying to put a formula to something that is very much heart and soul-driven!

So instead I ask myself – or did ask myself this morning in my journaling, which is what this post is based on (as always!) – how would I FEEL if I were ALREADY being truly fearless.

And here is what I came up with.

10 Ways to Be TRULY Fearless and Just. Fucking. Trust!

1. Don’t think, ask, hope or try – just do. Just decide what you want to do and how it will be, and do it. No need to question or wonder, just follow your inner ‘this feels right’ radar.

2. On program creation – do what feels fun, cool, interesting, exciting. Rather than asking ‘what should I sell’ or what WOULD sell create based on what you TOTES wanna do because how freaking awesome it would be!

3. Show up to have a great time each day. Come into your biz time with the intent that it’s going to be freaking rockin’ because der – why the hell wouldn’t it be!

4. If you’re feeling vulnerable, be vulnerable. If you’re feeling sad, be sad. If you feel like an on fire crazy-ass mofo who is making NO freaking sense but having an awesome time, be that! BE WHO YOU ARE.

5. Tell the truth. Back in my bar girl days – being the behind the bar therapist I was – I had no qualms about telling people exactly what I thought was going on and what shit they needed sorted. Whether or not they took my sage advice, who cares? I was telling the TRUTH not something I thought people wanted to hear or expected to hear and you can’t get any more fearless than just being damn honest! Interestingly enough it is when you be TOTALLY honest and ‘just you’ that you will attract your true tribe.

6. Assume things will work. Of course they will work. It’s you! You’re awesome! You rock at this shit! And if it doesn’t, who cares? Onwards and upwards because you were born for success and you know it!

7. Have fun with it. Selling something? Doing it in a way that makes you smile not grimace or feel slightly ashamed or feel scared. Just tell people what you have and why it’s so cool and why they gotta get it and be on your way!

8. Do stuff you totally know you rock and that feels awesome for you. Do it ALL OUT as though the whole world were already hanging off your every word!

9. Do stuff because it feels right but also because you just feel like why the hell not? Business is about exploration and trying new things as much as anything; nothing matters so much that it’s a life or death choice so just give it a go, have fun with it, put your true energy and soul into it, and see what comes of it!

10. Realise trust is a choice. Non-conformity is a choice. Being you is a choice! If you find yourself second-guessing, questioning, feeling uncomfortable or as though it’s just plain old not fun then it is probably you trying to follow the rules rather than simply BEING. So shake it off, laugh at yourself about it if need be, and then make a conscious decision to get back to just doing what feels right and fun and free for you.

One final thing I want to cover on all of this.

I realise that reading all of the above may well sound all very good and light-hearted and free and fun but hey, we’re not working in a bar here, this is BUSINESS, this is for REAL, right?! How the hell is just doing whatever you please and hanging out having a great time gonna make you money? How can you trust in that?! Shouldn’t you be more … organised? Adult? Or something?!

Well, this is where you CHOOSE to trust. Like I said in #10, trust is a choice. But also realise this – yes you COULD very well build a business by following the rules and you will attract a certain type of clientele who expect certain types of things from you if you do that.

If you just do you, all out, some people WON’T like you, they WILl think you’re irresponsible or they plain old won’t get it.


Either way some people won’t like you. So doesn’t it make more sense that you actively JUST BE YOU and attract in the clients and community who think the real you is a pretty cool chick? Doesn’t it also make sense that if you WERE truly fearless you’d probably come up with some extra-creative cool VERY much based on your true talents and gifts stuff, that’s likely to be WAY more successful than the boring, bland, samey-same vanilla cupcake BS you come up with when you’re following and conforming?

Just some food for thought. Stuff I FULLY believe in mind you! But most of all this-

There are a million ways to a million bucks; a million ways to impact millions or to make whatever difference YOU wish to make in the world.

Why not just choose a path where you get to have a damn good time doing it?

Just makes more sense. Up to you of course! But just remember –

Life is Now. Press Play.


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PS. Ready to get TOTALLY fearless about how you’re showing up in your biz AND life?

The Fuck the Shoulds Uprising is here and we kick off in just over a week but you can join NOW! It’s 15 Days to Epic Fun, Fearlessness, and a HELL YEAH Business and Life You Never Wanna Quit!

Click here to claim your place —> – it’s time to fuck the shoulds baby! And live life in a way that rocks YOUR world as well as the lives of those you will impact when you’re TRULY being you.